Badass Birthing God and COVID-19
Last week Lila asked why God would make a virus and when I responded that I didn’t think God made the virus she reminded me of a song we sing about God making Lady bugs and crocodiles, the sun to shine, big oak trees and goo-goo eyes on Daddy’s face. It names a spirit woven in creation and It is a lovely song composed by thoughtful clergy colleagues. But in this moment Lila wondered, “Why would SHE do this?”
I had to tell her the truth that there was a lot about how the world works that we don’t understand and are trying to learn about all the time. That I didn’t think God made a virus or that God would want us to be hurt or feel sad. She was not convinced and I suggested that in all the things I don’t know I do know that I see love at work when sciences and Doctors are working really hard to study the virus and make a medicines to help anyone who might get sick. That I think we can see God’s love when nurses and doctors take care of people when they feel sick and when we see love working or feel love working in us maybe that’s when we know what God is doing. She was not convinced and said, “Well I don’t think many people think like you do." I’m no Mr. Rogers, so I will keep trying.
We have a hard time with God and bad things happening. Our Christian theology has been framed by Greek Philosophy and in Greek terms God is all-knowing, all powerful, ever present and more. God is organized, has a planner that is color coded and never drops a meeting. She has a plan, an answer and moves big rocks…if needed. He is reasonable, measured and not passionate…sort of WASP-y if you get my drift. They were there in the beginning and they will be there in the end.
This is all fine until someone gets sick or something heartbreaking happens. With this kind of God when something goes wrong, it must be a part of the plan, like hurt is the way a loving God would teach us a lesson. We don’t know what to do with this so sometimes we say crap like don’t worry God has a plan. Maybe we wish She did or maybe it gives us a little comfort in the truth of uncertainty. The truth is our tradition shows us a God, fully present and an image of power and love that doesn’t match up to our Greek models. God in the Hebrew Bible is passionate, sometimes jealous and at least once get’s His hands in the dirt of creation. God is a mother bear and an Eagle with babies to protect, a mama hen drawing us close in love and no one is every presented with a perfect plan in the Bible as much as they are offered a promise of presence.
My theological God Mother (it’s one-sided and I’m the only one who calls her that) Elizabeth Johnson gave me language that I had only felt before but always needed. God’s power and God’s love are not distant but involve vulnerability and struggle. Most of history we have not wanted to imagine a God that is vulnerable, why pray to a God who struggles! We want a badass Warrior-King God who can crush enemies and viruses quickly. But what if God’s power isn’t power over as much as it is struggle with. Elizabeth Johnson gives what I find to be the ultimate metaphor, child birth. Labor is powerful and it not only shows the strength, courage and durability of the being but also the messy and painful vulnerability of being. Birth involves two beings moving in uncertain steps towards creating life and birth plans are nice, but they don’t always work out as we hoped. Birthing God is Badass; durable and vulnerable, and the truth is, in the end, She is more powerful when we need her most of all.
I don’t know why we struggle with a virus and face a global pandemic but I do know I see the pains of labor to bring life, preserve life and give life all around us. I see God in you staying home or you showing up at the hospital. I see God in the business neighbors grieving hard decisions downtown and the hopes we hold for what we can be and do together sometime soon. I see God in those working to bring relief that cares for all people, in those dedicating their whole hearts to finding vaccines and anti-virals and in a dozen moments large and small. I even had a chance to see God in Lila. She caught me in a moment of grief last week about all the little changes we had to make, she saw my worries of uncertainty and ran to her room, pulled all $21 from the little box where she keeps her really important things and gave it to me to give to the Abbey. I think its one of the largest gifts we have ever received.
God is with us. We are not alone. Thanks be to God.
This week I invite you to think about where you see God showing up:
• What worries are you carrying? What are the pains of labor in your journey?
• What does it mean to you to imagine God’s power and love as struggling with us?