Hard Earned Hope
Scripture: Matthew 1: 18-20
When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to dismiss her quietly. But just when he had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, ‘Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife.
—
Joseph is having a rough holiday season. He may not know about Christmas yet, but his Christmas is not the kind of story you put in a Christmas card. His fiancée is pregnant, and since this news is a surprise…we can imagine it’s not good news. Mary is pregnant and she shouldn’t be, at least by cultural standards, and there has never been a time in history where people would have said, “Oh Mary how wonderful!” and meant it whole-heartedly. Mary is pregnant and she shouldn’t be, and it doesn’t matter if it’s assault or a passionate affair, she is not marriage material any more, at least not for a righteous man. Any plans Mary and Joseph might have imagined together are just not an option. Her punishment is more than side eye from a self-righteous aunt, snide remarks at a baby shower and heavy social sigma; she can be killed or dismissed quietly.
Joseph, according to the scripture, is a righteous man. And for his context, a righteous man doesn’t marry his pregnant finance, even if he wanted to. When I hear Joseph is a righteous man, my mind goes to self-righteous. Perhaps it is the difference in context because we don’t use righteous very often and rarely in a positive way. I hear the word righteous and I think of arrogance and judgement, someone who places himself above at the expense of others, delighting in their pain…somebody who goes to church, obviously not this one, and has his life organized perfectly. Maybe it’s not fair or maybe it’s in part being able to imagine Mary’s fears, but when I hear Joseph is a righteous man, I imagine him as a self-righteous man, deciding Mary’s fate. Of course, when the author of Matthew wrote, “Joseph was a righteous man,” it was grounded in an understanding of righteous that links into a deep rooted faith in justice and compassion. It is a care that is well beyond self - perhaps that is why Joseph hears the whispers of angels in his dream. Joseph had the kind of dream that Dr. King had; a profound justice seeking dream; A dream that tells him that this child and this moment are filled with God’s spirit and divine purpose. Joseph is asked the impossible by this dreamy whispering and he says, “Yes.”
I once thought, “Well sure, an angel in a dream tells you and what else would you say but yes.” Of course I say that as someone who has never had this experience and someone from a very different context. Joseph didn’t living in a culture organized around nuclear families, his “yes” wasn’t just about him and Mary and a sweet little baby. His “yes” was hard news to a whole lot of people. He lived in a culture of honor and shame. You can imagine an invisible ledger tracking how you bring shame and honor to your family. Joseph choosing to follow the nudge of the Holy Spirit brought Mary’s shame into his family…his whole family. I imagine if his Grandma was something like mine, she would have said, “You had a dream...it was just one dream! It might have been something you ate…I think the hummus was bad.” His uncles probably tried to talk him out of it, there were folks whispering, “how could he throw his life away on this woman…oh he had so much promise…he was president of his senior class and the captain of the football team” (so not literally that but you get my point). And his Dad probably made that face he makes when he gets angry. The Angels ask the impossible and Joseph said, “yes.” This is the real miracle of the story and I suspect it is the fruit of being a “righteous man.”
The Angel gave Joseph a name, a sacred name and a nudge toward a sacred act. Naming a child means you claim that child as your own; Joseph does this and the name points towards divine purpose. The name Jesus is the Greek translation of Joshua, meaning “God Saves." Joshua, you may remember, brought the people out of the wilderness and into the promise land. Joseph listened to the divine wishers, picked up the baby, calmed his crying, cared for his needs, drew him out of danger and gave him a name for the ages and this “yes” will never be easy.
The Christmas Story is supposed to be good news, even the Angels say, "behold I bring you good news of great joy." Except the news is never what most of us would consider Good News. Mary, “good news, you are pregnant” - folks might stone you! Joseph, “good news, your fiancé is pregnant and King Herod finds this baby so threatening you will have to run for your lives!” It is such a hard story it makes me wonder if God understands what humans really consider to be Good News. Most of us would prefer Good News like, “Mary, good news you won the lottery and perfect health and the Romans are leaving your homeland and there is justice for all and women can vote now!” “Joseph, good news, your carpentry company is generating 30% more revenue than last year and your town voted you citizen of the year!” Good News here is a new home or a new farm or the sick friend is well or at least here is an easier path. There are so many options that are not a part of the Christmas story.
The Christmas story is full of hard news; maybe your story is too. Maybe this is a hard Christmas where you miss someone at your family table, maybe there is a relationship that is ending or one that you wish you had, maybe work is hard or maybe it’s not challenging enough, maybe there is some deep longing that you carry into this season or some deep grief weighing heavy. In his devotional, AlI I Really Want: Readings for a Modern Christmas, Quinn Caldwell shares the story decorating for Christmas as his father was dying. “That year, every little glass ball I put on the tree felt like an act of defiance. As I hung each ornament, it was like I was shouting, “Take that, misery!” “Eat it, addiction!” Bite me, cancer!” If you’re having the suckiest Christmas ever, just remember that’s how Christmas started. It was born in defiance of all that stalks the world and tries to snuff its light.”
His story reminded me of my own Christmas story. I was 26 and my five year marriage to my high school sweetheart was ending. I was living, like a champ, in my parent’s basement and substitute teaching at my old high school. This was not my idea, not my plan, and I had no sense of a possible future and no sense of a promise I couldn’t see. The movie, Love Actually came out in theaters and I was sure that he would be filled with Christmas Spirit and show up outside in the snow, boom box playing and cards in hand naming a new heart-felt commitment. I waited, I put up the tree a bit, I waited, I wound the lights around each branch and I waited. What I wanted that Christmas never happened. It was a season of tears but it was also a season of support, it was a season of struggle but it was also a season of learning. Maybe you have had a Christmas full of hard news, maybe you have had several.
Everything about the Christmas story is hard; none of it is bright and shiny. Not one moment is light hearted like the refrains of jolly carols. It’s not easy or fun. It does not smell like warm sugar cookies or feel like a warm hug. It smells like a manger and feels like a long road trip on a donkey while you are about to have a baby. It is hard.
The season is dappled with light and dark, laughter and tears, grief and joy; even the Christmas tree has dark recesses and brilliant points of light. Everyone in the Christmas narrative must face their worst fears, deepest worries and most profound loss. That’s why angels whisper, “Fear not.” Christmas is a hard earned hope; every single person in the story calls on their deepest reliance and grasps on to life. It is a pregnant woman, refusing the world’s shame, who dives deep into to her faith and sings an old, old song, “I help you see God.” “My soul magnifies the Lord." Christmas is a man, a righteous man who has a righteous dream and he risks everything to name a baby for divine purpose. All of them call to us today, to look at our great fears, our deepest anxieties and our profound grief and be not afraid. May we have the courage to grasp onto a hard earned hope. May it be so. Amen.